kowase | IC INBOX

The rest of the memory is fuzzy. Where I went after I escaped that three-eyed creature... I do not remember. I do remember wandering around a city made mostly of marble. I remember going to our family home. Burned husk that it was.

After that, my memories are ... difficult to understand. It is as if my mind is at a constant war with itself, and the memories are difficult to ... understand. Like listening to multiple radio signals at once.

[ he doesn't fully understand that he'd split himself in two--he only remembered bits and snatches of two different minds at war with one another. And it gave him a headache trying to understand either one. ]

You did not kill me. But I was so weak, I believe I was very close to it, anyhow.

[ dante exhales, downing the rest of his glass in a single swing. ]

That's because... [ maybe it would be better to tell him now, rather than let him live in this complicated mess of memories. maybe it would be better to shine some light on something that has undoubtedly been frustrating him ever since his memories began to filter back in. ] Yamato can do more than make portals. When you stumbled your way into that old house, I guess you decided to do something drastic. One last ditch attempt to beat me.

[ he pours another drink, gaze flicking to elsewhere in the room. ]

Did you know when Dad made those swords he imbued them with part of his power? It's kind of ironic when I think about it now, how he gave Yamato the power to split man from devil and he gave Rebellion the power to unify them. But that's what you did... you split yourself in two, that's probably why you're memories are like that.

[ Everything in his head is a tangled web of irritation and not-knowing. Spending days in a hot, uncomfortable box pretending to be Dante had made his patience run thin: Having the story outright explained for him right now is actually what he needs. It's clear he's clinging onto every word like it's water to a dying man in the desert.

He's coddling his current drink--not because he's started to feel a buzz, he'd need at least a dozen more before that--but. He's watching the other with a mix of ... confused, and fascinated interest. ]

I was not aware of this functionality of our swords. No. [ his eyes glance to the Yamato. Split himself in two...

How. ...Terrible. What a terrible decision to make...? ]

I did this baffling thing in order to 'beat' you. I cannot imagine how splitting myself in twain would help me be stronger.

[ ...ah. Wait.

It dawns on him. Rather, it isn't so much that he realises what it was; but rather. He remembers. ]

...The human heart was what I thought made me 'weak'.

Well, neither did I until I had the bright idea to stab myself with Rebellion with the Devil Sword Sparda on my back. [ finally, finally, unifying man and devil into a power beyond what he had ever had before and a new devil sword. ] Thinking back that was probably what woke that power inside me in the first place, if you had never stabbed me with Rebellion on the top of that tower it would've stayed dormant.

[ is he deflecting a little? yeah, maybe. the subject of vergil splitting himself and everything surrounding v is something of a... sore spot. ]

Yeah, exactly. You thought that by discarding your humanity you'd finally get the edge you needed to take me down, little did you know that it was that very same humanity that made you strong in the first place.

[ he... doesn't want to laugh--he's not quite in the mood to laugh, and yet, the sound is bubbling up from his throat anyway as the other reveals exactly how he'd woken up to his own devil powers. A memory flickering through his own mind as he ... considers saying what should be said, or keeping it to himself. ]

Who knew getting stabbed would be good for you. [ another long, pregnant pause. ] Truth be told, perhaps that is something we have in common. When I was... being chased. As a younger boy. By the demons that burned down our home. I managed to call Yamato to my hands. ...The demons ran me through with it, as well, before I managed to cull them all.

[ isn't that strange? Certainly not a coincidence. ]

Could you blame me for considering the human heart to be weak.
After all, humans are, by nature, brittle, short-lived things.

How was I to know better.

[ it is painfully ironic is what it is. an irony that drags up an old guilt from the murky depths dante once forced it down into, a small voice hissing into his ear: 'it's your fault, you chased him away all because you couldn't stand his attention being on that stupid book instead of you.' if they hadn't fought that day, if dante hadn't tried to take that damn book from him vergil wouldn't have been alone and their mother...

he pushes the thought aside viciously - no, he is not nursing that guilt again. he's not letting it sit and fester for twenty years like he did all those years ago. eva wouldn't want that. ]

That's some painful irony.

[ dante breathes out, cocking his head to the side. ]

Can't say I can, truth be told. Would've been nice if you learnt the lesson a little earlier in life, but better late than never I guess.

One thing that can be said about the human condition--one that I failed to see, due to my desire to completely discard that half of myself, apparently--is that we are never too old to keep learning things. One supposes.

Demons and Devils become cocky because they are confident in their power and cannot comprehend those who get stronger in the face of adversity.

[ he drags a thumb between his eyebrows--he can feel a headache trying to form, but due to his devil's blood, it will never truly settle; staying on the edge of his mind. ]

...This is not getting me drunk quickly enough. To think I used to drink half this and be done.

You're not wrong, brother mine.

[ dante laughs, reaching over to purposefully mess with vergil's hair. a distraction from the subject, from the pit they are dangerously teetering on. what's done is done after all, and they can't do much about it all now with the hindsight they now have. ]

Yeah, I know. It was a real pain in the ass trying to get drunk in the early days, what money I had left after Lady bleed me dry usually went into enough booze to kill a man. Even then the buzz never really lasted long enough.

[ there's a part of him that just wants to lie face-down on his desk, but. Showing weakness in front of dante? He couldn't do it. He has to steel his jaw and seem to be flawless--it was like an instinct, to never lower his head if he can help it. Showing he was stressed more than he already had? impossible.

He evens his gaze at dante. Wondering if he could will the other to leave so he can turn the lights off and just be alone with his new memories, new thoughts for a while.

He's used to being alone. ]

Perhaps it is for the best, and for the necessary health of beings like us that it does not effect us as much as it could.

Else I fear we may one day put ourselves into true danger.

[ he doesn't have to do much in truth. maybe it is because of their old age, or the fact that their twins, but he's found that he can read Vergil like a book these days. as such, he can see the way his brother's expression twitches, how stubbornly he holds onto the illusion of calm out of that stubborn instinct never to show weakness.

there is a part of Dante that wishes he would, that he would let that final barrier down instead of forcing Dante to break it down himself. but Vergil is Vergil and things are never easy with him. so he just smiles and finishes the last of his drink, placing the empty glass down on the desk and slips off it. ]

I don't need enough drink to kill God to do that, Verg.

[ he's been doing it for the last thirty years of his life. even with his brother back, even with some semblance of a family he's always longed for, some habits are impossible to break. ]

I've got some stuff I gotta do, I'll be back in a couple of hours. [ Dante rests his hand on Vergil's shoulder and squeezes. ] Call or text me if you need me, okay? I'll always come running.

[ with that Dante walks around the desk to the door, pausing only briefly to flick the room's main light switch off before leaving. closing the door behind him as he goes.

one step at a time. ]

IC INBOX - kaisou

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